learning to write love on my arms.

• 2012-11-07 1 note

  for so long, i have been faking belief. my disillusioned heart had become calloused and hard, but my words, softened by shaky smiles, created a mask so no one was wiser. this past weekend, i was ready to be done. to give up. to lift my hands towards the ocean and say goodbye to god.

  the scene couldn’t have been set more beautifully. several friends, sisters in this journey if you will, gathered at seabrook to soak in the joy of each other. and not only did my body find rest, but my heart found healing. deer, the crashing ocean waves, and well placed “god moments” crushed the walls that i was holding onto. i left feeling new.

  this fragile, fickle heart still has some doubts and fears, but i now know, without a doubt, that i do not have to walk this road alone. no matter how hard this shall be, i have family to hold me up until i see the value in myself that they so easily see.

• 2012-10-29 0 notes

  speak. shout. scream, if you have to. the world can take it. we can take it. our words are strength, and when you are able to share yours, we will sing along.

  — {r}

• 2012-10-27 0 notes

  {sing me to sleep}

• 2012-10-25 1 note

  grace is always greater. always.

• 2012-10-22 0 notes

  

  “Nini, will you hold me hand?”

• 2012-10-19 811 notes

  {green or blue}

  (via tomsandtiedye)

  Source: greenorblue

• 0 notes

  

• 2012-10-12 0 notes

  i wonder.

  i wonder if i’ll always subtract ten pounds from my weight.

  i wonder if my vanity will always be shown through how i treat my hair.

  i wonder if i will forget my body is a temple and fall back into self destruction.

  i wonder if i will believe in god as strongly as a child does.

  i wonder when god will become a proper noun again.

  i wonder if god is angry at my disbelief even though i know he’s not.

  i wonder if i will always struggle with feeling my body is only useful for sex.

  i wonder if i will struggle with loving my future children as much as i love her.

  i wonder if i will ever forgive myself for losing her even though i know god has.

  i wonder if i show jesus in my actions.

  i wonder if i will ever stop having issues with religion.

  i wonder if i will ever readily give grace and forgiveness to those who caused me deep scars as jesus readily gives me grace and forgiveness for causing his.

  i wonder.

• 2012-10-09 1 note

  

  six. {happy birthday} (Taken with Instagram)

• 2012-10-06 1 note

  the ragamuffin gospel is changing my world.